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Neuro Linguistic Programming has come a long way in Sales Training and its power to motivate young folks landing the big cities with smart cheating skills specific to industries like politics, media and entertainment. Though they are “Made in India” for absorption into every industry possible, especially finance, real estate, governance, prostitution, media, TV / Bollywood, pharma / drug mafia, religion and retailing services. The wisdom is when you as salesperson smile your muscles are stretched, as they stretched your neurons fire & you feel good about yourself. But what was discovered in an experiment through monitoring / analysing both subjects was that when the person who sees you smile, they also release happy endorphins, just by seeing you smile. You need to agree, even if you don’t agree while selling dreams of any color.

To some extent, selling (just like versatile TV + Politics Anchors) appears tragically manipulative. You have a product, message or service plan where you give the perception it have more value than it has in reality. So you need to manipulate people to buy or subscribe it. This seems sad. But for the past 20 years all I have been doing is selling. Selling products, selling services, selling businesses, selling messages, selling myself. As a defective by design, many times I had failed to act forcefully manipulative overriding the deeply ingrained cultural value systems, so I was less successful. Hardcore pros will promptly judge that I am in the wrong profession, really?

What if I do not like the way it is since beginning, maybe pursuing to challenge the status-quo and change it from within, unwanted revolution, ironic? It will depend if there are viable alternatives that will motivate people to believe in a different way, if there are other ideas as pleasurable, as powerful, as fun, as passionate with which consumers can identify. Sometimes I’ve even sold things I’ve had such passion for that I sold it cheap just because I wanted the message out about what I was selling – a sort of crude promotion.

We live in a hardened world where our basic needs demand currency, and as we get older we become responsible for the basic needs of others. We become adults. Adults sell for today. Trained professionals sell for life. Nobody is going to buy from someone they hate. The buyer has to like you and want to be your friend. People pay for friendship, and sales crooks are experts in disguising as smart opportunistic well-wishers. This sounds sort of whoreish, and it is. The times when I’ve hated myself the most were the times when I’ve prostituted myself to make money (this isn’t as sexual or immoral as it sounds literally but it might as well be, ask some feminists).

Friendship outweighs almost every other factor in selling. One time I wanted to do a website for XYZ.com. How did I do it? The main decision maker was involved with a school for charity. I went up there for four weeks in a row and played 5 kids simultaneously in chess. Everyone had fun. I got the website job. My competitors were all bigger, better financed, and probably better.

The only good outcomes come when both sides like each other. Now I only do business with people I like. Abandoned all those learned economic cum social terms which rates and defines wisdom or status on the basis of accumulated wealth. The fastest way to lose all your resources, mutilate your heart, and then kill yourself is to work with people you don’t like, or vice-versa. I will never do that again. Nor do you have to, despite what you might think or brainwashed by gurus. Fall-back on crude laws of nature, exploitation of one situation eventually leads to another – good for some, bad for some.

Saying No: Instead of pursuing something you really don’t want to do, you could free up time and energy to find something more lucrative or something you would enjoy more. Opportunity cost is the one biggest cost in all of our lives. We spend it like there’s no tomorrow. And guess what? Eventually there’s no tomorrow.

Supply and demand. If you reduce the supply of you then the demand for you goes up and you make more fun. You’ll hate yourself. I see this every day, particularly in my own life. The reason I can write about this is not because I’m an expert. We don’t write about the things we know. We right about the things that are deep down challenges for us right now. When I say “yes” to something I don’t want to do, I end up hating myself, hating the person I said “yes” to, doing a bad job, and disappointing everyone.

If someone pays 100, you need to give them 110 worth of value. Think of that extra 10 as going into some sort of karmic bank account that pays interest. That money grows and compounds. Eventually, there’s real wealth there. And that wealth translates into wealth in the real world. People are 3-year-olds. They like to get gifts. People want to do business with people who give them gifts. Over-delivering is a gift. And it makes you feel good. Give and you will receive.

Be a friend. However flimsy that connection of friendship is. Follow on Twitter, follow on Facebook. Say nice things about the person to other people. Never gossip. Do the art of the check in. Eventually you will find the “yes” with that person. It could be, and often is, up to 20 years later. Who knows? You plant a seed and eventually the garden blooms. I once wanted to do the website for sports. I met the guy running their site. He kept saying over and over again, “we can’t afford a lot” and I kept saying, “don’t worry about it” and would show him more and more of our work.

I write for a lot of places right now for free. Any medium I love, I am willing to write for. It’s like a dream come true for me. The benefits from doing that have been incalculable. Not always financial, but always real. We are a combination of many constituencies inside of our bodies and minds. Financial is just one. But all of our constituencies need to work together to make us well-balanced and peaceful. The art of selling, for me, is to have everything inside of me working together.

Often the best way to make friends and customers for life is to direct them to a better service or product than yours. Be the source of valuable information rather than the source of your product-of-the-day. Then they will know forever that you are a trusted source. Trust is worth more than next month’s rent being paid. Trust builds a bridge that will never wear out. At some point in the distant future, when you are on the run in every other way, you may need to cross that bridge.

Your offering is not your product or service. Your offering is product, services, your employees, your experiences, your ideas, your other customers, and even (as mentioned above) your competitors. Sell them all. Stop going to big entrepreneur round tables, get-rich conferences. In the long run nobody cares about your product. In the long run, it is the entire holistic view of your offering, your service, you, that you are selling. Without that, you will build a mediocre business that may or may not pay the bills. With that, you will create real worth!

When you get in, do not sell your product. People make a decision on your product in five seconds. Sell the dream. The dream has up to infinity in value. Build up images of the dream. Give a taste of what the dream is like. Let it linger. Let it weave itself. Let the imagination of the buyer take hold and run with it. But then, you might ask, do I risk under-delivering. Yes, sometimes.

If they have gone from friend to enemy for whatever reason and it seems like there is no repair, then fire your customer. The sooner the better. This applies to not just customers but everyone in your life. If someone no longer has your best interest at heart, then in your own self-interest you need to back off. A bad customer spreads like a disease inside you, your employees, your other customers, your competitors, your future customers, your family, etc

We spend years building a garden. We plant the seeds. We tend the soil. We water the plants. But we are also the sun. The sun shines no matter what. It doesn’t care which flower blossoms. The sun is always there providing value every second of the day. Be the sun and you will become abundance, you are the wealth, not what you own or possess as propagated by cronies and high paid salesman trainers converting the low IQ human minds into some winning lairs!

Finally, you do not need a fancy degree from so-called top ranking A-B-C schools, colleges or universities unless you want safe job placements selling for some other celebrity boss or their proxies! Basic selling instincts are born with you, inbuilt into your character when you were a kid, its how you exploit them for your benefit matters the most.

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